Dr. Gpt: Stupid IFS
Me:
What advice would you give to a client who has been told they could use IFS as a therapeutic model but due to the spiritual abuse they experienced in their childhood (where they were told their body was wicked and that the voices in their head were either god or the devil) they find IFS to be incredibly triggering?
Dr. Gpt (aka ChatGPT):
For a client who has experienced spiritual abuse, where they were told their body is wicked and the voices in their head are from either God or the devil, using Internal Family Systems (IFS) can indeed be triggering. The abuse likely created deep fears around internal experiences, making the concept of “parts” or internal voices feel threatening or spiritually dangerous. In this case, a very gentle, trauma-informed approach to IFS is crucial.
Here’s how I would guide the process:
Acknowledge and Validate Their Experience: Begin by affirming the client's feelings about how IFS triggers them. Spiritual abuse can warp how someone relates to their own mind and body, leaving them hyper-vigilant about any internal experience. Let them know it's normal to feel cautious, given their history.
Reframe “Parts” in a Safe Way: Instead of referring to the parts of their mind as voices or entities, which can evoke the old, harmful narratives from their past, I would suggest describing them as natural emotional states or aspects of their personality. These parts are not external forces (like God or the devil), but simply parts of their own psyche trying to communicate distress, protection, or needs. Reinforcing the idea that these parts are them, not something foreign or external, can help alleviate some of the fear.
Ground in the Body: Since spiritual abuse often involves a disconnection from the body, it may help to focus on safe, grounding practices before doing any parts work. Learning to feel a sense of safety within their physical body can create a foundation where they are more likely to accept and engage with internal experiences. This can be as simple as focusing on breathing, feeling the ground under their feet, or practicing mindfulness techniques that keep them in the present moment.
Work with the Protective Parts First: Many people who have endured spiritual abuse have very strong "protector" parts that have helped them survive trauma by shutting down overwhelming feelings. These protector parts may be hypervigilant or dismissive of the entire IFS model. Instead of challenging these protectors, start by building a relationship with them. Explore what they fear and why they believe it’s dangerous to engage in IFS. Gaining the trust of these protective parts will allow the client to move forward without feeling overwhelmed.
Access the “Self” Compassion Gradually: The goal of IFS is to bring the Self (the core, compassionate part of the person) into dialogue with the parts. But in cases of spiritual abuse, the concept of a "core Self" might be entangled with harmful religious messages about purity, worthiness, or sin. I would introduce the idea of Self as simply the part of them that is calm, compassionate, and wise, rather than tying it to spiritual or religious language. This can help create a safe, non-threatening way for them to access their Self.
Create Boundaries Around Spiritual Language: It might be helpful to consciously avoid spiritual language that could trigger old patterns of thinking. In IFS, parts are often named or personified, but for someone with a history of spiritual abuse, personifying parts might evoke memories of religious teachings about demons or external spiritual forces. Instead, language like “emotions,” “states,” or “roles” could be less triggering.
Integrate Other Therapeutic Approaches: While IFS can be incredibly powerful, it’s essential to integrate it with other therapeutic methods that emphasize safety, such as grounding techniques, trauma-focused cognitive behavioral therapy (TF-CBT), or somatic therapy. These approaches can offer a sense of security and emotional regulation before diving deeper into parts work.
Give Permission for a Slow Process: Let the client know it’s okay to go slowly and that they have control over the process. If certain concepts in IFS trigger fear or discomfort, it's essential to step back and not push forward until they feel ready. Empowering them to set the pace gives them autonomy in their healing journey, something they may have lacked during their childhood experiences.
In short, I would advise focusing on safety, reframing IFS concepts in ways that don’t evoke spiritual abuse, and giving the client full control over the pace of the therapeutic process. It’s also important to explore how their history impacts their relationship with their inner world and work slowly to build a compassionate connection to their parts.
